Whole body:
Side views:
Well this is me for the moment. More to come soon....
XOXO
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Pics...as I promised!
I am finally posting the more recent pictures I have taken. I have compared them to the pictures from the night before surgery, what a difference. I do not always see what others seen in the comparison, but when I look at them side by side I do finally notice a difference. Thanks to all my amazing family and friends who have supported me through these changes. Love you all!!
Well this is me for the moment. More to come soon....
Well this is me for the moment. More to come soon....
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
One year ago...
Well yesterday was one year since my surgery. Wow, time flies!! I am so grateful to been given this opportunity to change my life and my health. I have learned a lot about myself and who I am this last year, and I have realized that I was so lost for so many years.
As for me...I have lost 148 pounds in my journey. I have come to terms that this is the average teenager if not more, and at times it is depressing to think I weighted that much. When I look back I see how unhealthy I really was. When you are overweight you do not realize how unhealthy you really were, until you can look back and see. I must say, I LOVE to shop now a days. I think Dan resents ever taking to me to the mall for clothes. I could spend a lot of money there now! The only negative thing I can say is that I am OVER the extra skin issues!! I can not wait to have children, because once we are done I am getting it all removed someday!! It is so frustrating to try on clothes and having to go a size bigger so the extra skin looks ok. Grrr...that is one thing I hate about shopping. However, I would rather deal with the extra skin issues then the weight and edema issues I had before.
I have learned that I have the most wonderful husband in the whole wide world :) (I have known this for a long time actually). Dan is my BFF and definitely my better half. He is my rock and always will be. He helps me when I want cookies, he reminds me that I have come so far. Sometimes a cookie is needed, but not as much as I want them. The hard thing with this journey is that my stomach is gone, but my mind is the exact same. Its frustrating, I wish candy and ice cream made me sick, then I would not crave them. I am still learning everyday, and although its been a year this is still a learning process for me. I am sure it will always be a learning process...
My family are the people I adore. I may not agree with everything they do, but they are the best and I wouldn't trade them for the world. My mom is everything to me, I couldn't live without her. Even though she gives me a hard time for eating chips or cookies at a family BBQ, I know she wants the best for me. My sisters are my best friends, and I love and adore them both. Through thick and thin, fights and disagreements, I still love them. My dad is very supportive and I love that my journey has helped him change some of his ways too, I just want everyone to be healthy. Kolby and Jayden are my little loves. I love that Kolby would always say "Your not fat, you just have extra blood" he always made me feel better even before surgery. Now he just says you are so skinnier :) I adore him! Jayden just loves my bathing suit tells me I should wear it everyday. She is such a little diva. Vickie, Conrad, and all the step-siblings (even you Karla) are all so supportive and loving. All my Aunt's, Uncle's and cousins are awesome too...Like I said, I have the best family in the world.
My friends are amazing. I am so blessed to have the people in my life I do. I wouldn't change anything! I have learned this year that people who you thought were your friends, may not have been. It's been a rough year, and I look forward to speeding time with my current friends, making new friends and seeing what the future holds.
What next in my life? Well obviously a lot of you know what one year means....
I am in the clear to get pregnant. Nothing yet of course, I need to see a lot of doctors first. I want to make sure I am cleared and the doctors have everything figured out ahead of time. With my kidney disease, I have to worry about my high blood pressure, and my medications, and what all this will mean with a baby. Hopefully soon though, Dan and I (Roxy too) are definitely ready to add a new member to our family.
I currently do not have a recent photo. Promise they will come soon, I have just been really busy with school and working a lot of OT. Time to start saving for new things hopefully soon.
Sorry it has been so long to all who like updates...I promise to be better. I know I say that a lot, but I will!!
As for me...I have lost 148 pounds in my journey. I have come to terms that this is the average teenager if not more, and at times it is depressing to think I weighted that much. When I look back I see how unhealthy I really was. When you are overweight you do not realize how unhealthy you really were, until you can look back and see. I must say, I LOVE to shop now a days. I think Dan resents ever taking to me to the mall for clothes. I could spend a lot of money there now! The only negative thing I can say is that I am OVER the extra skin issues!! I can not wait to have children, because once we are done I am getting it all removed someday!! It is so frustrating to try on clothes and having to go a size bigger so the extra skin looks ok. Grrr...that is one thing I hate about shopping. However, I would rather deal with the extra skin issues then the weight and edema issues I had before.
I have learned that I have the most wonderful husband in the whole wide world :) (I have known this for a long time actually). Dan is my BFF and definitely my better half. He is my rock and always will be. He helps me when I want cookies, he reminds me that I have come so far. Sometimes a cookie is needed, but not as much as I want them. The hard thing with this journey is that my stomach is gone, but my mind is the exact same. Its frustrating, I wish candy and ice cream made me sick, then I would not crave them. I am still learning everyday, and although its been a year this is still a learning process for me. I am sure it will always be a learning process...
My family are the people I adore. I may not agree with everything they do, but they are the best and I wouldn't trade them for the world. My mom is everything to me, I couldn't live without her. Even though she gives me a hard time for eating chips or cookies at a family BBQ, I know she wants the best for me. My sisters are my best friends, and I love and adore them both. Through thick and thin, fights and disagreements, I still love them. My dad is very supportive and I love that my journey has helped him change some of his ways too, I just want everyone to be healthy. Kolby and Jayden are my little loves. I love that Kolby would always say "Your not fat, you just have extra blood" he always made me feel better even before surgery. Now he just says you are so skinnier :) I adore him! Jayden just loves my bathing suit tells me I should wear it everyday. She is such a little diva. Vickie, Conrad, and all the step-siblings (even you Karla) are all so supportive and loving. All my Aunt's, Uncle's and cousins are awesome too...Like I said, I have the best family in the world.
My friends are amazing. I am so blessed to have the people in my life I do. I wouldn't change anything! I have learned this year that people who you thought were your friends, may not have been. It's been a rough year, and I look forward to speeding time with my current friends, making new friends and seeing what the future holds.
What next in my life? Well obviously a lot of you know what one year means....
I am in the clear to get pregnant. Nothing yet of course, I need to see a lot of doctors first. I want to make sure I am cleared and the doctors have everything figured out ahead of time. With my kidney disease, I have to worry about my high blood pressure, and my medications, and what all this will mean with a baby. Hopefully soon though, Dan and I (Roxy too) are definitely ready to add a new member to our family.
I currently do not have a recent photo. Promise they will come soon, I have just been really busy with school and working a lot of OT. Time to start saving for new things hopefully soon.
Sorry it has been so long to all who like updates...I promise to be better. I know I say that a lot, but I will!!
Friday, February 18, 2011
February 2011
So I have very much slacked on this blog idea, but I promised an update would be coming so here it is!
I am doing great! I know everyone wants to know the numbers so here they are....So far I have lost a total of 131 pounds!!! Since the day of surgery, which was August 2, 2010, I have lost 96 pounds! This is amazing to me, that in a little over 6 months I have lost so much weight! I have been kind of slacking on my exercise, and I know that I can not do this or I will fall right back into the "old me." Sometimes its hard for other to understand I think. I can not even explain the feeling, but the gym sometimes makes me feel like I am trying to become something I'm not. I am trying to be heathy, so I will be able to start a family...but its just a feeling that I can not describe. I feel bad, and I had a moment today where I realized I need to take ownership of the new me. This is me now, and how I will be for the rest of my life. Weightloss and such a change in self image is a lot harder emotionally than I ever thought. I still feel fat, and I still do not feel pretty at times. I know that a lot has changed but when will the emotions come around and I will be able to 100% enjoy being the new me. I don't know what else to say about the emotions, it is just so many changes in such little time. It's hard for me to even wrap my fingers around how much my life has changed. As for other health issues, I go see my nephrologist (kidney doctor) on March 1, 2011. I have not seen him for a few months, and I really hope that all my labs are good, and we can keep moving in the right direction. I will give a update after that appointment. :)
Other than that stuff, my life is pretty great at the moment. Dan and I are great, just waiting until my 1 year since surgery so we can hopefully start a family. August can not come soon enough!! We are both in school full time, and the RN job issue is getting better with time. I am able to help educate my patients on the importance of being heathy, and I can speak with them about personal experiences, and this can hopefully give them the hope that they too can get back to a healthier state.
Ohh I must add that I FINALLY cleaned out my closet. Dan was on my case for months regarding this issue. This was way harder than I thought it would be. Getting rid of my "fat girl" clothes was sad!! I was like can I keep this and Dan quickly said NO. I thought he was being so mean, but now I look back at that night and I am thankful he was strong enough to say no to me :) I gave away a total or 4 big moving boxes to goodwill, and now I do not have to search through all different sizes to find something to wear. It was "out with the old me, and in with the new me!" I also must add that being able to shop anywhere is way better!! I actually like shopping (never thought I would say that).
The pictures below are from the day before surgery and then today. I really only see a differnce still when I look at these side by side. So on that note, I am going to toot my own horn and say " YAY ME!! I ROCK!!" :)
I am doing great! I know everyone wants to know the numbers so here they are....So far I have lost a total of 131 pounds!!! Since the day of surgery, which was August 2, 2010, I have lost 96 pounds! This is amazing to me, that in a little over 6 months I have lost so much weight! I have been kind of slacking on my exercise, and I know that I can not do this or I will fall right back into the "old me." Sometimes its hard for other to understand I think. I can not even explain the feeling, but the gym sometimes makes me feel like I am trying to become something I'm not. I am trying to be heathy, so I will be able to start a family...but its just a feeling that I can not describe. I feel bad, and I had a moment today where I realized I need to take ownership of the new me. This is me now, and how I will be for the rest of my life. Weightloss and such a change in self image is a lot harder emotionally than I ever thought. I still feel fat, and I still do not feel pretty at times. I know that a lot has changed but when will the emotions come around and I will be able to 100% enjoy being the new me. I don't know what else to say about the emotions, it is just so many changes in such little time. It's hard for me to even wrap my fingers around how much my life has changed. As for other health issues, I go see my nephrologist (kidney doctor) on March 1, 2011. I have not seen him for a few months, and I really hope that all my labs are good, and we can keep moving in the right direction. I will give a update after that appointment. :)
Other than that stuff, my life is pretty great at the moment. Dan and I are great, just waiting until my 1 year since surgery so we can hopefully start a family. August can not come soon enough!! We are both in school full time, and the RN job issue is getting better with time. I am able to help educate my patients on the importance of being heathy, and I can speak with them about personal experiences, and this can hopefully give them the hope that they too can get back to a healthier state.
Ohh I must add that I FINALLY cleaned out my closet. Dan was on my case for months regarding this issue. This was way harder than I thought it would be. Getting rid of my "fat girl" clothes was sad!! I was like can I keep this and Dan quickly said NO. I thought he was being so mean, but now I look back at that night and I am thankful he was strong enough to say no to me :) I gave away a total or 4 big moving boxes to goodwill, and now I do not have to search through all different sizes to find something to wear. It was "out with the old me, and in with the new me!" I also must add that being able to shop anywhere is way better!! I actually like shopping (never thought I would say that).
The pictures below are from the day before surgery and then today. I really only see a differnce still when I look at these side by side. So on that note, I am going to toot my own horn and say " YAY ME!! I ROCK!!" :)
P.S. Promise to post again soon :)
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